Wednesday, June 12, 2002

The Day After The Next Day

The battle ship we where working on is finally finished, and we can all finally get off this freaking rock ball off a planet. The commander unfortunately is dead, but who cares! He died while surrounded by hundreds of Zergling and Hydralisk, while leading a patrol. That's what he gets for poking everyone in sight. I on the other hand, almost got my head chopped off, again! That is not the only time I came close to loosing a limb, or some part of my anatomy. Anyway, I am just glad that I am going to get of this stupid planet.
Those fire bat guys are really getting on my damn nerves. Man are they a strange bunch. What is it with them and fire anyway? Oh and a reminder to self. Don't mention any reference of cold or ice. Expressly the term, "When hell freezes over" to fire bats, when they get mad, the get MAD, raging inferno if you put it. I did exactly that, and almost got burnt to a crisp, literally. Not only do those guys love fire, they have a raging temper to go with it.
Last night I spent some to with this cute female medic, well all of them are female.....Anyway, we had some rations, and later the big thing the men want from the medics are physicals. Hey! Where in the middle of nowhere, surrounded by deadly Zerg, who are bent on our destruction. You do the math!

Tuesday, April 09, 2002

The Next Day

December, January, no maybe it's June something. I don't know, and right now I don't give a damn. I've been stuck on this planet for months surrounded by millions of Zerg. I'm surprised that we lasted this long against all this Zerg, and that stupid commander is still poking me, so you know what I did? No I didn't turn him into a smocking crater. I shot his foot and made it look like an accident. That's what he gets for poking everyone so many times. You know come to think about it. He pokes the guys more then he pokes the women medics! Ewwwww, That was a lovely thought!
Anyway, on the bright side, we are on construction on a battle ship to get us of this mud ball, and hopefully back home to Earth.
Oh and yesterday, on patrol, we encountered a group of Zergs. We killed all of them, but one was still left half alive, and one of the fire bat guys dropped his fire bat suite and stuck his butt next to the half dead Zerg and let out a huge fart, and killed the Zerg!
I knew they where full of hot gas but this takes the cake! It was a good thing we all had our helmet on or we would have been killed along with the dead Zerg.

Saturday, March 16, 2002

"I, Marine" A Diary Of A Lone Marine

I can't believe I'm still alive after fighting the Zerg, and now the Protoss, and this is why I left Earth? To fight a war light years away from home. That's not the best part of all! The entire Earth fleet left back for Earth. After suffering a huge defeat by the Zerg. Leaving a number of men behind on this rock ball of a planet to defend our selves from who knows what. I almost got my Head Chopped off last night after encountering a wondering lone Zergling, during patrol, and today I finally got a couple of hours off time from duty to complain about something. With out saving my butt from certain death, but at least the guys from on the fire bat squad are taking it cool, or should I say Hot.
Couple of men on the fire bat squad, or as I call them "Fire Bugs", are having a BBQ tonight, again! Their mato is "Don't light a match, I'm full of gas", and I'm not talking the kind of gas when your eating beans.
The Commander is also a strange one. He keeps on poking me and everyone else for no apparent reason. Some of the other Marines have already vested interest in turning the commander into a smoking creator, but as for me. I would just ripe his head off, and feed his remains to the Zerg, but that's me. It is fast efficient, and if I plan it right. I can get away with out anyone knowing. No one will suspect anything. Since we are out in the middle of know where surrounded by killer Zerg. Hey, anything can happen.
(Note to self, don't brag about killing the commander, if I actually have the guts of doing it.)